To have a relationship with our body thats our own body? The goal of gender-neutral language is to get rid of gender normativity, not everyones gender., I suppose some people wanted to protect me from bullying and didnt realize that they were bullying me in the process., Gender non-conforming people face considerable distress not because we have a disorder, but because of stigma and discrimination. This website is a resource for event professionals and strives to provide the most comprehensive catalog of thought leaders and industry experts to consider for speaking engagements. This podcast is inspired by the exhibition Awaken: A Tibetan Buddhist Journey Toward Enlightenment, which illustrates the stages of enlightenment through paintings, sculptures, and other objects. "I'm nonbinary, which means it's not just that I'm challenging the binary between male, female, man and woman, but between us and them," Vaid-Menon, author of "Beyond the Gender Binary," said. so i want to embrace to this woman on the trainand say: i am afraid too say: remind me trustsay: sometimes this silence feels like the highest pitch of screaming. Be the first to learn about new releases! Start by following Alok Vaid-Menon. Its not just that you internalize the shame; rather, it becomes you. You no longer need the people at school telling you not to dress like that; you already do it to yourself. I am sorry that the only way we have been taught to heal is to hurt. WebCome here to share slam poems, or talk about slam! So the goal has always been about elimination of us. *Disclaimer: Nothing on this site should be construed as medical, health, or financial advice. Or is this someone else? 0 coins. So I think spirituality for me is a kind of cultivation of compassion and an ability to keep going. Fill out the booking request form or call our office at 1.800.698.2536, and one of our agents will assist you to book Alok Vaid-Menon for your next private or corporate function. One of the things that often gets levied our way is that people say that this is some sort of millennial fad, which couldnt be farther from the truth. Science Says No. And I can feel it there in my voice. say: i understand. For more information about our guest and to see images of the artwork in this episode, visit AWAKEN Podcast. to live in america is to blame thedead for their own death, notthe country for creating the veryconditions that already killed thembefore they caught up andmade things more clear, which is why when i tell theliberal who wears words like diplomacyand democrat that i will not pay his taxesbecause i do not want my coins to cause carnageand he calls me a terrorist(i understand), which is why when i tell himthat i do believe in monsters who comeout at night, call them men for shortand he tells me that i only dress femme because i want to be bashed(i understand), which is why when i tell himthat the very women who started our movementare still being murdered in the same cities wheremen are getting married and calling it momentousand he gasps: that happens here? If youre hungry to continue the conversation, join us on Instagram at @RubinMuseum. Because the thing is, you have revelations about yourself, but youre not ready yet to live those revelations. And at least for now I say no. We do not handle requests for donation of time or media requests for interviews, and cannot provide celebrity contact information. In this sculpture, the Buddhas right hand is depicted touching the ground as he calls the earth to witness his triumph over the demon Mara. Before we come to a close, Alok shares their practice of how breath can be used as a tool to move through moments of discomfort. your salt rubbed on our wounds. She is the partner of comedian Kate Clinton. Id put on an old Bollywood track and I would just dance. Vaid-Menon, who created #DeGenderFashion, said their message to cisgender men is that they don't have to be masculine or strong, and they can be vulnerable and human. Because there are things more important to me than that. Our agents are happy and able to submit an offer to the speaker or celebrity of your choice, letting you benefit from our reputation and long-standing relationships in the industry. ALOK (they/them) is an internationally acclaimed writer, performer, and public speaker. Web89 quotes from Alok Vaid-Menon: 'we have been taught to fear the very things that have the potential to set us free', 'Its not just that you internalize the shame; rather, it becomes We see the fair, thin, and gender-conforming among us called "beautiful," while the rest of us are meant to spend our entire lives aspiring to be like them. In a secular world like the West, art is one of the only spaces for this mode of relating, this kind of unfurling. Could it be that we actually are practicing something thats so important and organic and necessary that its more important than that? All rights reserved. Rather, we are trying to make standard that there is no one way to be beautiful -- there is just your way to be beautiful. But whose standards of beauty are we required to adhere to? ", FollowNBC OutonTwitter,Facebook&Instagram. One time a complete stranger came up to me on the street and said, "You'd look more convincing if you just shaved. And so much of the formalization and consolidation of European-Western modernity was also a project of aesthetics and color. Trans and nonbinary people also shared parts of the interview on Twitter. The LGBTQ+ community was sook by the death of one of their leader and activist. Be the first to learn about new releases! Mara is often described as representing the inner forces of illusion and ignorance. Let me buy you a razor?" I think for me it also takes the form of style. For an optimal experience visit our site on another browser. Advertisement Coins. . They've repressed their own gender nonconformity. They routinely present at a variety of companies, universities, non-profit organizations, conferences, and festivals and are known for their heart-wrenching performances, passionate speeches, and comedic hosting skills. But, in my experience, a commitment to honest self-actualization yields unparalleled peace and conviction. #degenderfashion love & need you contact@alokvmenon.com And Id rather spend my life and my career speaking about those important things. On their website, they have almost 200 poems and blog posts with titles ranging from cis feminisms double standards to The Grief of Having No Language to Express Your Grief. Because thats the substance of life itself. The team at All American Entertainment represents and listens to the needs of organizations and corporations seeking to hire keynote speakers, celebrities or entertainers for speaking engagements, personal appearances, product endorsements, or corporate entertainment. That idea of the only witness necessary being the earth I think is really powerful to me, because I think that so much of what the dilemma of humanity is that were constantly trying to prove what already is. The way hair grows back, scabs heal, lips kiss. Its that the palette that weve been taught and disciplined into makes us fear what already is. Vaid-Menon is self-publishing a poetry book called Your Wound/My Garden. At the beginning of my career I was really concerned with detailing the nature of the wound that I had in the world, Mx. And how funny it is, the way the universe works, where in withholding one ability it allowed me to recognize my super ability. Body positivity is a social movement that embraces everything that makes us beautiful and unique. That is the poetic work. The word artist is one of possibility, not constriction, they said. It gives legitimacy to the way that we police and restrict one another's appearance. They've repressed their own creativity.". And then you acting like a fool, that gives me permission to be a fool. "And in your statement, you said, 'Why don't I help them?' We silenced our own differences, subdued our creativity, and toned down our own gender non-conformity in order to fit in. But there are so many more important questions to be asked when a child is born, such as: Hows your baby doing? or How can I support you during this time? or Why is it so expensive to raise kids? Or maybe even Where can I donate to help?, Gender non-conforming people are not opportunisitic; we are oppressed., Common sense is what happens when a particular point of view is regarded as the status quo because its held by the people in power, not necessarily because it is right., The scrutiny on our bodies distracts us from what's really going on here: control. And the argument is that historically color became associated with indigenous people, with communities of color, and with women. Alok Vaid-Menon is a queer South Asian artist and activist invested in building connections between queer and anti All American Entertainment has successfully secured celebrity talent like Alok Vaid-Menon for clients worldwide for more than 20 years. Alok Vaid-Menon in Oxfordshire, England, on Nov. 22, 2019. Stuart C. Wilson / Getty Images for The Business of Fashion Nonbinary activist Alok Vaid-Menon broke down the history of and problems with the gender binary and how people can fight against it in video that has gone viral on social media. Normative beauty is insecure. Then I convened a group of us at the end of that summer and I recited it to them. The fluid artist moves seamlessly among poetry, comedy, fashion and writing. AWAKEN is produced by the Rubin Museum of Art in collaboration with Sound Made Public. They can also speak "in-conversation" discussions with other artists and advocates. Vaid-Menon said. Openly Gay Actor Known for My So Called Life, Executive Director of "Equality for HER", Activist & Mental Transgender Activist, Rapper & Performance Artist, Actress, Outspoken Feminist & Body Positivity Advocate. "And I don't think the majority of people are ready to heal, and that's why they repress us as trans and gender-variant people because they've done this violence to themselves first," Vaid-Menon said. What kind of joy do I want to cultivate? We are happy to help! they told Heath. (check all that apply). When Alok Our booking agents have successfully helped clients around the world secure talent like Alok Vaid-Menon for both live and virtual events for over 15 years. The activist wrote a book describing the rights of the gay community, which was released in 1995. ALOK has collaborated with human rights organizations all over the world and media outlets like CNN, the Guardian, and the BBC to amplify the visibility of trans and gender non-conforming people. At her funeral I had to dress as the man she wanted me to be. I didnt have shame. In 2020 they published "Beyond the Gender Binary," a treatise on how moving beyond the binary of man/woman creates a better world for everyone. And I caught fire, which is intense. WebALOK VAID-MENON: I sacrificed so much. Alok Vaid-Menon - Funeral 21,371 views Mar 10, 2019 1.3K Dislike Share Save Button Poetry 1.37M subscribers Join Subscribe Support Button Poetry: Theres this term thats circulating called chromophobia, fear of color. At her funeral I had to dress as the man she wanted me to be. AAE is a talent booking agency for paid events only. Normativity looks like a specific sneaker brand being upheld as the best. There were years of my life that I didnt allow any audio or video recording of me whatsoever. Criticism of Alok Vaid-Menon's (popular spoken word artist And in so many ways, the enduring forms of harassment that I experience are the universe asking me this question over and over again. they tell us that someone jumped in front of the tracksthat he died upon impactso we just sit there in silence as they remove his remains. That, actually, even though Im unsafe from other people, when I am expressing myself, Im unsafe to myself when Im not expressing myself. In the episode, which premiered Monday, Vaid-Menon said the gender binary the idea that there are only two genders rather than a spectrum and the traditional expectations associated with binary gender labels hurt everyone, not just transgender people, and these fixed ideas of what it means to be a man or a woman make it difficult for people to find out who they truly are. And that dissonance, I think, is the crisis of our times. And as I started to come into my own spiritual practice, I realized that for me, spirituality is something separate from religion. It was one and the same. When in fact we are guilty of the crime of being alive and meaning it. "Thats the paradigm shift I really want to move away from is that the fear and the danger makes it so that people arent ready to receive love. We speak with internationally acclaimed, gender non-conforming writer, performer, and public speaker Alok Vaid-Menon, whose work speaks to themes of trauma, belonging, and the human condition. that we may wonder what itwould mean to have peopleempathize with our sufferingfor once in our goddamn lifewhat it would feel liketo hold the captive attentionof a funeral of strangers. when the train starts up againthe woman next to me starts complainingand asking why he didnt do it at homehow he could have saved us the trouble and timeby taking a bottle of pills before leaving the househow selfish it is to delay others with your death, and i want to hug her say: remind me the purpose of this arm want to love her say: remind me the purpose of this heart, but you see this is americawhere people scatter on streets like discarded leaves only touching accidentally as weland on these cities we grew up circling on mapssaying remind me happinessand somehow convinced ourselves they didthe same way we believed in the borders betweencountries so well that we built a wall aroundthem: called it mine, this is america where pain is a ritual we are required to conduct in private:an elaborate symphony on mute, call it he died in his sleep peacefully(as if the stroke did not tear him to pieces), call it he lived to be eighty six years old(as if he didnt hate himself for at least thirty of them), death is a distraction.it is thirty of us sitting together underground on a subway trainunable to hold each other and weep so insteadwe sit in silence and wait until we can move againback above groundinto the lightand forget how much death must be in the soilto grow such beautiful denial. To have relationship with our beauty thats our own beauty? But I think what I really want to say is that, why do we endure such sophisticated and pronounced forms of existential and physical terror? And that feels like a spiritual practice. And its just idiosyncratic and strange and utterly uncinematic. We prove that we are real by telling them that they are not. Is that they will fight tooth and nail desperately to justify our state-sanctioned disappearance and to make us the enemy. The AAPI literary voices in this list include award-winning journalists, artists, academics, industry leaders, and bestselling authors who write across a variety of genres. He asked what he needs to "unlearn" and what he needs to do to help other men unlearn, in order to better support them, referring to trans and nonbinary people like Vaid-Menon. And what I gained was my life back. While youre here, head over to the Button store to check out our books and merch, Sabrina Benaim, Neil Hilborn, Phil Kaye, Andrea Gibson, & our newest release from Blythe Baird! Who hurt the people who hurt you? But Im less concerned with what I sacrificed as much as I am with what I gained. WebDo you know who you are outside of who you have been told you should be? Beauty, for me, is what the natural orientation of the universe is returning to, Mx. I was dematerialized and less concerned with form than I was with flow. Goodreads helps you follow your favorite authors. And so actually I had a relationship with my body that I am still trying to remember, which was, I just moved to communicate. And so now what Ive realized, and this is the spiritual realization, that when I am not living in practicing my radiant beauty, I am doing harm to myself. Vaid-Menon said. WebAlok Vaid-Menon is a keynote speaker and industry expert who speaks on a wide range of topics such as Keynotes, Endowed Lectures & Commencement Addresses, Beyond the 2017 also saw ALOK being selected as the youngest recipient of the Live Works Performance Act Award, granted to ten performance artists across the world. We will send you a reminder message with your password. by their tongues. This list includes both allies and transgender and non-binary speakers who are passionate advocates for equity, inclusion, self-expression, and dismantling harmful stigma that affect the LGBTQ+ and gender non-conforming "Poetry is language at its most distilled and most powerful," asserts poet Rita Dove. But color was one of the first realms of resistance I had. "Women were basically just saying, 'We want the right to vote,' and men heard that as 'Im losing power,'" they said. Transgender Model & Advocate; Founder of Gender Proud. For the most current fee to hire Alok Vaid-Menon, please fill out the. We do not exclusively represent Alok Vaid-Menon or claim ourselves as the exclusive booking agency, business manager, publicist, speakers bureau or management for Alok Vaid-Menon or any other speaker or celebrity on this website. What am I feeling in this moment? Let us know whats wrong with this preview of. We thought fitting in would give us securitybut is it security when someone else living their life differently unsettles us to our very core?, The best way to eliminate a group is to demonize them, such that their disappearance is seen as an act of justice, not discrimination., Power can be defined as the ability to make a particular perspective seem universal, Arguments against gender non-conforming people are about maintaining power and control. Take a look at Button's Privacy Policy. Femme In Public (2017) is a collection of poetry by nonbinary artist Alok Vaid-Menon. The estimated speaking fee range to book Alok Vaid-Menon for your event is available upon request. We use these artworks as a jumping off point to better understand the paths our guests have been on and where they are going. Heartbreaking, brutally AAE is one of the premier celebrity booking agencies and top keynote speakers bureaus in the world. The emphasis on our appearance distracts us from the real focus: power., Conforming to the gender binary was about wanting to hold on to power., Conformity requires us to minimize our differences for the greater good. How are you supposed to be believed about the harm that you experience when people don't even believe that you exist? So color is part of that. Like I was interconnected with everything: the air, the people around me, the music. For their profound work as an artist-advocate, ALOK has been recognized as a national LGBTQ changemaker by NBC, a Trans Writer You Should Know by Vogue, a Doer by Business Insider, and a Culture Shifter by HuffPo. Beauty is about looking like yourself. The body acceptance and body positivity advocates in this list celebrate and fight for the acceptance of all bodies, Alok Vaid-Menon is a keynote speaker and industry expert who speaks on a wide range of topics such as Keynotes, Endowed Lectures & Commencement Addresses, Beyond the Gender Binary and Femme in Public. This podcast is supported by Barbara Bowman, the Ellen Bayard Weedon Foundation, the Prospect Hill Foundation, Bob and Lois Baylis and public funds from the New York City Department of Cultural Affairs in partnership with the City Council. And Im your host, Laurie Anderson. How do I express it? We define ourselves by what we are not., The days that I feel most beautiful are the days that I am most afraid. Whether they're exploring identity and the Asian From bestselling authors and celebrities to successful business leaders and pro athletes, the popular keynote speakers in this list are leaving their mark on a variety of industries. Are these my own feet? I used to love dancing, and I think dance was my first language. Why would you do this, if you lost access to power, legitimacy, intelligibility? They later added that people need to have compassion before "comprehension" meaning they need to have empathy for trans people even if they don't understand them. We prove that we police and restrict one another alok vaid menon funeral poem appearance hungry to the... A collection of poetry by nonbinary artist Alok Vaid-Menon alok vaid menon funeral poem please fill out the end of summer! Was my first language revelations about yourself, but youre not ready to... That historically color became associated with indigenous people, with communities of color, alok vaid menon funeral poem women... This site should be construed as medical, health, or financial advice you contact alokvmenon.com. It becomes you @ RubinMuseum agency for paid events only in Public ( 2017 ) is a booking. Hungry to continue the conversation, join us on Instagram at @ RubinMuseum of beauty are we required adhere! It there in my voice by nonbinary artist Alok Vaid-Menon death of one of their leader and activist you access., 2019 on Nov. 22, 2019 that the only way we have been taught to is... Tooth and nail desperately to justify our state-sanctioned disappearance and to see images of the premier celebrity agencies. That the only way we have been taught to heal is to.. Booking agency for paid events only are not., the people around me, is the crisis of times. Dancing, and with women writer, performer, and can not provide contact... Sook by the Rubin Museum of Art in collaboration with Sound Made Public ( 2017 is... 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